Adam is no karate kid. But an old Tarzan? Maybe! (chapter LXXIII)

Hong Kong Romain Jacquet-Lagreze

“So you like it here?” I asked Maggie. After all, even if she had signed old Mr. Me’s contract, which May Linh and Lily had already signed before her, and which said that they had to live in the nude around me, I was hoping that Maggie would somewhat appreciate where she had unexpectedly landed, in my house by the beach in this always warm southeastern Asian country.

We were on the front porch, it was evening and it was dark already. Maggie had been with us for about two weeks and May Linh and Lily had left today together for a week. So for the first time, other than when I drove her here from the train station, I was alone with Maggie.

She was drinking bloody Maries, I was drinking beer and none of us seemed to care about eating, probably because none of us cared to fix dinner. I had rolled a French joint and, to my surprise, Maggie had smoked it with me”. “How did you find pot here”, she asked, actually curious. I didn’t tell her about Carter’s side business of course. “Local brew” I said.

We were both looking at the sea and the big sky and there was a nice moon, almost full, and bugs were singing their heart out in the jungle. So we remained this way on the porch for a while, silent. Maggie couldn’t probe my mind like May Linh and Lily could so I had to be more explicit and, I guess, I felt at one point that I needed to say something.

“So you like it here?” I asked.

Maggie looked at me, her highbrows questioning, then I saw her looking back out at sea, far. She was pondering the question I guess. She took her time answering. Then she talked. “First I was horrified and I thought there was something utterly perverse in your contract, then I was mortified when I discovered Lily’s massages, with Mr. You” she said, her cheeks reddening a little.

Yeah I knew the feeling about Lily’s massages, and May Linh too. I waited.

“But now, after these two weeks… ” Maggie hesitated. She seemed to be looking for words, finding none so she sighted and said: “Yes, I like it here. I do although I never imagined I would. You know, being born and raised in Hong Kong, I never imagined myself as a female Robinson yet I must say I don’t recall ever feeling so healthy and feeling so relaxed, in two weeks only!!! I’m naked, ok, but everybody is, other than Mr. You, but with the swimming and the food, I can’t recall when I last felt so incredibly strong, body and mind. And then I look at May Linh and Lily, how beautiful and strong they are, how they swim and how they dive, oh my god…!!!”

She paused.

“You know, it’s kind of weird for me not to hear sirens, police’s sirens, emergency sirens resounding all day, it’s weird not to drive, not to have to drive or meeting anyone, not to be surrounded by millions of people. I don’t have to run anywhere. I don’t even have to worry about what would I, or what should I, wear today. No phone calls, no business, no hurry for nothing and none of these phonies who, all day, can’t hide their drooling and lecherous thoughts, some of them don’t even try, because they know they’d never ever fuck a woman like me. They are the perverts and the world is full of them and full of shit, well the world I don’t know but Hong Kong is full of these fucks, let me tell you. And they’ll beg and kiss your feet, only the richest providing enough. Oh my god, was I tired of those assholes, it was oppressing. Here I don’t feel oppressed, and I even have a contract for Christ’s sake, a fair one even.”

She stopped and seemed to be thinking of something. I saw anger disappear from her face, replaced first by a faint smile and then she turned to me and said: “And here you are! Can you believe it? I still can’t believe myself who’s fucking me now? Old Mr. You!!! And in the ass!!! And the thing is, thanks to Lily I guess, I even LIKED it! Oh my god, I can’t believe I’m saying this, I didn’t even know it was possible! Holly Jesus! If those guys back in Hong Kong would see you, they would hallucinate. ‘Who you say is fucking Maggie now?’ I can see them sorry fucks, how jealous they would be.”

And now she was really laughing and soon she couldn’t stop. Like a kid who made a good prank, she was now laughing uncontrollably and she had a hand on her mouth, the other on her pussy, just to make sure she wouldn’t pee so much she was laughing. “Excuse-me,” she managed to say to me and then laughter took her over again, she was screaming with it and couldn’t help her tears.

“Excuse-me,” she said again, hiccupping with laughter still, “but you understand that if my friends, my girl friends I mean, and some of my gay friends I guess, knew about this back in Hong Kong, knew who I’m fucking now…” and she was looking at me and chuckling “old Mr. You…” she said and she cracked up again.

There I was in my shorts, drinking beer.

Yet, I could tell her laughter was not demeaning for me, she was not being mean or sorry or whatnot, she was just laughing about the absurdity of the situation which, indeed I guess, had to be funny for her. I mean, look at old Mr. Me. Yeah, I was thinking, I don’t know what or who she was fucking before but I could see that if she’d send a picture of old Mr. Me to her girlfriends in Hong Kong, they sure would be quite surprised… Jesus Christ, I could imagine their face and their look of bewilderment.

I must say, the Tarzan in me kind of liked the prospect of stunning cold Maggie’s girlfriends in Hong Kong with old Mr. Me’s newfound vitality. Yeah I’d liked that. Once vain, always vain. So I started to laugh too and I let her carry me away and we both laughed heartedly for a while, together.

Then we calmed down. She was glad I guess that I didn’t feel hurt by her jokes. “My god, old Mr. You, with May Linh and Lily, you guys would be a riot with all my friends in Hong Kong, you could make a lot of money,” she said, smiling and laughing again. “Yeah I guess,” I said, ogling her nude body as if I had never seen it before.

“But this wouldn’t be possible in Hong Kong,” I said.
“I guess not,” she said, and she wasn’t laughing anymore.

So I got up and told her I was going to get drinks in the kitchen; I really needed to take a leak. But I took my time fixing her bloody Mary, figuring she could use few minutes alone to come back down from this high emotion she just had.

I brought back the drinks. She was smoking. So I lit a cigarette too and I was ready to just relax and sit here, drinking beer, not having to ogle at her nude body like a maniac simply because it was already there and there was no urgency. I still caught a glimpse of her here and there but not much more than glimpses because Maggie wasn’t yet generous with herself to me and she’d show me nothing on her own devolution. That’s probably the reason why I was still so far from fondling her once!

All of a sudden, she broke the silence. “Yes,” she said, “I’m happy to be here now. I can’t quite explain why but I’m very glad to be here. Thanks for letting me stay.” I was happy to hear that and I felt encouraged, maybe now was the time to talk about the fondling stuff.

Just then, she got up, to seemingly stretch. She was standing right in front of me, facing the ocean and, when I least expected it, I had all of a sudden plenty of chances to watch her up close and in details and she was stretching every which way, and bending over right and left. Jesus Christ, her body was superb, her ass was superb, her bullet hole was superb and she smelled of the ocean and the wind. She also gave away a fragrance that was uniquely hers, just like May Linh and Lily had their own scent, all better than any perfume I ever came upon. As for old Mr. Me, I guess I smell of beer and smoke.

Maggie sat again. From then on, I could have spent the entire evening right there on the porch not saying a word, watching the ocean and the big sky, listening to the jungle, and that worked perfectly with May Linh and Lily, all three of us being not that talkative in the end. In fact, that was part of the contract: no question asked!

“So, Mr. You, tell me…” Maggie was asking, “what’s this place here all about? Don’t get me wrong, like I said, I like it here and, if you want to know, I like it kind of a lot. Still, I can’t help but wonder: Who are you? Why are you here? Don’t you have a wife, children somewhere? Grand-children for Christ’s sake? I’m sure you had a wife and kids… You’re that type of guy. But May Linh? Lily? So what’s this place all about?”

‘I’m a space invader’ is the first thought that came through my mind

“It’s home to the Jedi,” I said.
“The Jedi?” Maggie said, surprised. “Who’s the Jedi?”
“Who do you think is the Jedi?” I asked
She thought of it for a second.
“Lily,” she said, “Lily is the Jedi.”
“Yes,” I said.

“But that’s not what I meant,” Maggie insisted.
“What did you mean then?” I asked. “There were so many questions in your question”.

“I mean, your family,” Maggie said, “where are they? Did you abandon them? Desert them? Did they all die in an airplane crash? Don’t you care for them? Don’t you love them? And where are they? Why are we here?”

What about my family? I thought. How could I begin to explain kids to Maggie who, for what I understood, didn’t have a kid either and, now that I knew her age, I understood this could be an issue for her. How could I tell her about the aliens who allowed me to leave but leaving behind everyone happy and secure? More so than the money, how could I tell Maggie that children leave, and so they should, and eventually you don’t even see them for Christmas, and that’s ok, so they should, and grand-children are living in faraway places and for all I know one of my grand-child might walk on Mars, and maybe further, and how to tell Maggie of how time goes by fast and how you reach a point where that’s it, routine has won the battle, your universe has settled and life has become tasteless, lame and sorry and how to tell her that’s where I was when I got lucky with aliens? There was nothing I could tell her really. So I said nothing. She didn’t insist.

“How’s your family?” I asked Maggie after a while. “Do they know you’re here?”
“NO, nobody knows I’m here,” Maggie said, suddenly on edge.
“Ok, ok,” I said, “relax, ok, nobody knows.” And I held my hands up to let her know this was not a robbery.

“But you’re really coming from Hong Kong, right?” I asked, with a smile that said no war.

She was all beautiful and nude and the lights from the candles were drawing shadows on her body and I couldn’t help but gaze at her. I knew I could but still…

Just then, she had a sorry smile and I didn’t see it coming.
“Yeah, I guess, Hong Kong,” she said.

Ellar Wise

Iconography : Vertical horizon by amazing French photographer Romain Jacquet-Lagrèze


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