“Lily, what is it that May Linh and old Mr. Me can do for you?” I asked. Indeed, since agreeing to my contract, which stipulated that, for a very good salary, she’d be living in the nude with me, Lily had given May Linh and I a lot more than what I ever expected or imagined. And she wasn’t ever asking anything for herself. She was a giver. Yet there had to be something WE could give her. And there was one thing.
“Well”, Lily said, “there’s that show that comes on every day at five, it’s called Married with children.”
That’s what she said, I swear. There we were, May Linh, Lily and I on my porch in my house by the ocean in this southeastern Asian country and I could see the big sky and I would never be thankful enough to aliens. And now this: Al Bundy? What in hell!
I had asked Lily what May Linh and I could do for her and then Lily talks about a TV show??? I was at a loss and I could tell May Linh was too. Lily saw it on our faces. The good thing when you’re living naked – well I wasn’t naked, I was in my shorts, but May Linh and Lily were as naked as naked can be – so the good thing about nudity is that you can’t hide much and Lily knew exactly what we were thinking the moment we thought of it.
“Yeah,” Lily said, “it’s an old show but a very funny one, I love it, it makes me laugh.”
May Linh didn’t know of Al Bundy, Peg and Bud and Kelly Bundy so she had no idea of what Lily was talking about. But I had lived in Chicago long enough to know Al Bundy was the mayor of that town, and his last name was Daley. What the fuck!
There I was, in a safe bubble, as if in a panic room, somewhere in Asia and there was the ocean and the big sky and May Linh and Lily, both nude, and this was real. What in hell did Al Bundy had to do with this?
I looked for help in May Linh’s eyes and found none. So I got more green vegetables and more shellfish into my mouth with my chopsticks so that I had time to think of something. I still couldn’t think of anything so I figured that, at last, I’d see where that leads us.
I saw Lily take a big breather, having another faint blush, and then she went.
“See,” she said, “from as far as I can remember I had to take care of my family. I remember, when I was a little girl, I had to put my two little brothers to sleep and they would ask me to caress and scratch their back and I would do it and they’d go to sleep. When they were asleep and serene and at peace, I was happy for them and I was happy for myself that I could put them to sleep in such a serene way, before they’d know anything about the world other than just their loving big sister – half-sister really – scratching their back to put them to sleep, and I had to do it with both hands because they were two boys. I was doing this every night – somehow, because I started once out of a good intention I ended up having to do it every day and every night; and don’t think I’m complaining, this is just a side note – anyway, doing this every night, I got an understanding of their little boys’ bodies. And I started to understand the bones and the muscles and the nerves and I could tell my little brothers were going to sleep like happy campers, as the Flintstones would say.”
The Flintstones??? What in hell is Lily learning by heart when she’s on her laptop with her red headphones on I thought?
“And while I was scratching my brothers’ backs,” she continued, “I could hear the TV in the living-room and I knew my mother and my step-father were watching TV and I remember this as happy times.”
May Linh and I remained silent. Lily knew she could trust us, I guess, because she spelled it out. She too must have felt she was in a safe bubble and that was maybe her only chance.
“See I like that show, Married with children, and I watch it in English,” Lily said, “and for many years now it comes on four days a week, Monday through Thursday, at 5 pm, our time, on this channel I can watch on Internet also and, if at all possible, every day at 5pm, I take a break with the Bundys and they make me laugh so much and then life doesn’t seem so shitty anymore. It’s a funny show and, at the massage parlor, at the end, all the girls were watching it with me, even clients and the owner of the parlor. It’s funny, you make people laugh and even the cruelest of assholes will pause and laugh with you for a minute before going back and fucking you again. Now, I often watch episodes I already know but I still laugh and one day I’ll speak English like Peg and no shoe salesman will come and tell me what to do.”
I could tell May Linh was just as flabbergasted as I was, and May Linh had no idea about Al Bundy! I knew better than open my big mouth so I shut up.
“Well,” Lily said, her cheeks very red now, “there is one thing the two of you can do for me and that is to caress me and scratch my back while I watch TV, and I only watch TV at five, for Married with children.”
I saw a veil of shame passing on Lily’s face, as if she had given up some unspeakable secret.
We were all silent for a while. So I looked at the big ocean, at the big sky, and I could hear the bugs’ ruckus in the jungle, and I knew May Linh wouldn’t say anything so I knew old Mr. Me had to do something.
“Ok,” I said, “so we have an appointment with the Bundys tomorrow at 5pm?”
“Yes, that’s be nice, if it’s OK with you guys,” Lily said and she bowed her head and averted our eyes but I could tell she was relieved. Well, we certainly could do that for her I thought, and I’m pretty sure that’s also what May Linh was thinking.
So that’s how it went. The next day, a little bit before 5 pm, May Linh and I asked Lily how she wanted us. May Linh had purposely stopped playing her piano for this occasion, which I’m sure Lily noticed. And Lily told us the way she wanted it. First she turned the TV on in the office. It was weird to see the TV on in the house. Commercials were on I could tell although they were in a language I don’t understand. Then again, who needs to understand the language when watching commercials on TV?
Then she told May Linh so sit on the couch facing the TV, then she told me to sit next to May Linh, who was on my left. Then Lily went on to get a pillow from the bedroom and set it on the couch’s arm next to May Linh. And then Lily, stark naked of course, just laid down on her stomach, on our laps, putting her head on the pillow toward the TV and by now the commercials were over and I could recognize the theme song.
Love and marriage
Love and marriage
Go together like a horse and carriage
Let me tell you brother
You can’t have one without the other
And there was the Buckingham fountain. What the fuck!
So May Linh and I sat on the couch and Lily was now laying on us just as the show started. May Linh and I didn’t know what to do at first and then we remembered the caressing and the scratching. May Ling had Lily’ back and Lily’s head, including the long hair, in front of her, me I had in front of me Lily’s butt and legs.
So May Linh and I started caressing Lily and gently scratching. And, please help me god, Lily started to kind of purr – I can’t think of another word – and I could tell her body was relishing the attention in the way I could feel Lily’s abandon under my fingers. It is said, I read, that, after the clitoris, fingers’ tips have the most sensitive nerves per square centimeter in a human body. In other words, the fingers are very sensible and mine, in this instance, could feel how, and it was so odd, how Lily was now somehow utterly relaxed.
And I understood she must have been waiting a long time for this. And I understood no one ever gave HER a massage.
I only wanted to caress and scratch and be nice but my fingers seemed to have a life of their own and Lily butthole was along the way and responding, just like the whole of Lily’s skin was responding under May Linh’s nails writing love and understanding on Lily’s back. And I loved and understood too and was as tender as I could. But I just couldn’t help it, my fingers had to wander and Lily was responding and she was getting wet.
To tell the truth, I don’t remember which episode of the Bundys we saw this first time – or any of the episodes in the few days that followed – because I was gamahuching Lily and May Linh was also giving Lily her best and there was such a sweet abandon in Lily, and May Linh and I loved her so much that I got frantic and we all got frantic. I could tell my dick was hard and they both could tell and frantic Lily, so much loved, at least the way she saw the caressing and scratching dedication, took hold of the situation and, making sure everything was cool to everyone, gave me her ass – no kids, like she says – and May Linh was still caressing and scratching when I felt Lily’s contractions and came into her. All three of us on the couch. Christ!
And Peggy Bundy was saying:
“Honey, do you want to know how I saved you money today?”
“No I don’t,” was Al Bundy’s answer.
Well, just like in the massage parlor I guess, we got used to the Bundys and it soon became a ritual. No matter what, Monday through Thursday at 5 pm, we’d stop whatever we were doing, which was never that much once you think about it, and we’d set up in the office. Lily would turn the TV on, May Linh and I would get set on the couch, Lily would get her pillow and we’d caress her and scratch her back as she watched her favorite show. And Lily laughed at the Bundy’s jokes and I’d laugh too and, soon enough, May Linh would laugh also.
There was no way old Mr. Me could fuck every day, twice a day sometimes, for ever, not even for very long. So, watching Married with children, eventually sex became moot. I would gamahuche Lily with my fingers a little bit but, for the most part, May Linh and I were caressing and scratching Lily for the duration of the show, 30 minutes, including commercials in an Asian dialect I couldn’t understand. And that’s when Lily got really what she was looking for I guess, watching TV and having her back scratched, at length enough, at least 30 minutes, and that is a lot more than what most people can pray for.
May Linh and I were happy to caress and scratch Lily’s back because we were happy to see her happy in such a juvenile way. Christ almighty, she was still such a young women. What has happened in her life? I found it sad that she could be craving attention and love so much. Then again, isn’t our lot, for all of us?
Well, one evening, as I was going through my shotgun house with no door to the kitchen to grab a beer, I sensed, more than I saw because it was dark, I sensed, as the two of them had gone to bed already, that neither was asleep yet and, through the darkness, I perceived that May Linh, turned on her left side, like always, was scratching Lily’s back to sleep.
And then I really got it. I didn’t know what Lily’s terrors were. And maybe better I didn’t. But I forgot about getting a beer and going back outside to sit on my porch. I turned all the lights off, took a leak, then I washed my hands real good and then I hurried to bed, because I wanted to get there before they fall asleep.
As I slid under the sheet, I knew somehow that I had made it in time. So I loved my old bones against May Linh’s warm body and I started to caress May Linh, giving her a nice French finger kiss, as I could feel the movements of her arm scratching Lily to sleep and, I don’t know, but it seems we all went to sleep like that.
And, since then, this had been how May Linh put Lily to sleep.
And that’s probably what Lily wanted in the first place.
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